


Hole In My Heart

by proxenitis



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Feels, Fate, Fluff and Angst, Grim Reapers, Love, M/M, Spirits
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-15
Updated: 2017-04-20
Packaged: 2018-10-19 08:35:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10636215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proxenitis/pseuds/proxenitis
Summary: Death must have read his mind, because he smiles, taking a step forward. "If I bring him back, Iwaizumi Hajime, it will be so that you two will never have met."Or;Wherein Oikawa dies and Iwaizumi makes a deal with the Reaper to bring him back to life.





	1. Shi

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first every fanfiction so *fingers crossed* i hope at least some people like it
> 
> ps: imagine shi as daishou suguru :)

The night air is woven with the sound of imminent fire and the blaring of sirens, but Iwaizumi can only hear his thumping heart.

"O-Oika..." the name disappears in Iwaizumi's mouth as he looks at his best friend through a vision blurred with tears. "No... please, no, this - no."

He gets no reply to his cluttered collocation. Oikawa's lifeless body lay limp in his arms, illuminated by the fire still ablaze a few feet away. Tears fall onto Oikawa's face, vanishing in the fresh burnmarks.

"Y- no, this can't... this can't be happening. Oikawa, listen to me, please. Answer me, Oikawa, _p-please_." Iwaizumi's voice cracks as he lowers his head, mind reeling, heart throbbing, stomach churning. "Wake up...Tooru, w-wake up," he murmurs, to no avail whatsoever. His tears fall in torrents, clouding his vision further as his body quivers along with his sobs.

"Oh, God, no, please," he utters through broken syllables of cries. "Bring him back, please," Iwaizumi whispers, hugging Oikawa's body to his chest. " _Please_."

 

Death smirks, leaning against the burning building with his arms crossed across his chest. He takes in the scene once more before making his way to the half-breathing pair.

 

"Well, well," someone squats down beside Iwaizumi, who gasps at the sudden appearance. He ganders to his left, blinking to keep the tears at bay as he takes note of the boy (man?), clad in black and green, brown hair swept to the left, one corner of his lips tugged upwards in a simper. 

His grip on Oikawa tightens protectively.

"Wh-"

"My name is Shi," the man speaks, as if reading Iwaizumi's mind. He eyes Iwaizumi intently, hazel eyes then falling to his best friend. "Oikawa Tooru, eighteen years old," Shi dictates in a low voice. 

Iwaizumi widens his eyes at the man, the person whom he has never seen before. "H-how do you know him?" 

He barely shrugs, tugging up his lips higher. "It's part of the job. See, I'm currently on duty. I've come to take him with me, but I have a feeling you'll showcase defiance."

Iwaizumi stares blankly, his head aching with the flurry of thoughts. "What are y-"

Shi merely smiles coyly. "What does my name translate to, Hajime?"

Iwaizumi takes in a sharp breath at the shock. How did this person know his name. Who the hell even is he? 

Shi...

_Death._

"That's right." The smug voice utters, and Iwaizumi furrows his eyebrows. Had he said that out loud?

"Oh, no, you did not. I can read minds." 

Iwaizumi's fingers stiffen on Oikawa's arms, and he shudders.

"That's a very...ominous name." Iwaizumi whispers, because his voice is too sore, too shocked to speak properly.

"Quite fitting for Death himself, wouldn't you say?"

His while body stiffens now, ears ringing. Iwaizumi hesitantly chances a glance at the person - if he can even be called that - and his eyes widen at the hood that has suddenly appeared around his head. His torso, previously comprising of a green shirt, and black pants and jacket, are now replaced with a dark robe with green detailing.

"That's n-"

"Oh but it _is_ possible. I wouldn't be standing here otherwise." Shi chants, standing up. Unexpectedly, Iwaizumi is standing too, and he doesn't remember doing it himself. 

"That was me, of course." Shi muses, smirk everpresent. 

Iwaizumi tears his gaze away from Oikawa, his best friend, the most important person in his life and everything beyond and in between, before meeting green-flecked-hazel eyes. 

"Can you...bring him back?" Iwaizumi questions hesitantly, desperation lacing his raspy voice.

"Why, of course."

His heart soars for a moment.

"Not without a price, however."

Iwaizumi doesn't miss a beat. "What is it? Tell me, please, I'll do anything, just bring him back!" He pleads, leaning forward. 

"That's quite a bold statement, Hajime. Are you sure he's worth it?"

"Of course he is." Iwaizumi replies obstinately. The tears are back now, but he doesn't care. He'll do anything, _anything_ , to bring his best friend back.

Shi must have read his mind, because he smiles, taking a step forward. "If I bring him back, Iwaizumi Hajime, it will be so that you two will never have met." 

Iwaizumi snaps his head up, surprised the impact doesn't leave him with a broken neck. His heart is thumping erratically, ears picking up on the sound. A life without Oikawa...

"It's a life without him either ways." Shi shrugs.

"W-will I remember him?" Iwaizumi asks, voice shaky. His while body is shaky, for that matter as he leans down beside Oikawa, making sure to take him in fully, touching the burnt contours of his face gently, running his fingers through the soft tufts of his brown hair.

"The brain can't remember what never happened." Shi narrows his eyes as he grins. Iwaizumi feels like his heart is being squeezed mercilessly, his entire body aching because, as Death said, it's a life without him either ways.

But, he is nodding his head stiffly, not caring about the aftermath, because just existing in the same world will be enough. As long as his best friend is alive, and well, the circumstances don't matter. If these two are meant to be in each other's lives, it will happen at one point, maybe not till they're eighteen, or even thirty, but Iwaizumi. Doesn't. Care.

He just wants him to be _alive_.

So, Iwaizumi makes eye contact with Shi, surprised to see the soft smile playing at his lips. 

"Very well," he nods, conjuring up a blue light from thin air. "The life of Oikawa Tooru, eighteen years old, for his past with Iwaizumi Hajime, also eighteen," and he leans down, placing the ball of light in Oikawa's chest and Iwaizumi watches it disappear with wide eyes.

Suddenly, a gale of wind churns around him, and the distant sound of sirens quiet down. His surroundings dissolve into flashes of memories going backwards. In the middle of it all, Iwaizumi, and Death stands beside Oikawa, looking unaffected. 

Iwaizumi trails his eyes along the images of him feeling for a pulse after dragging Oikawa out from the fire, which was an event that followed him seeing the fire in the gymnasium and running in without a thought with his mind only thinking of the person who may as well be his other half. Then, he is angrily stomping to school to bring his best friend home in the first place because _for fuck's sake, the idiot didn't even finish practicing before dinnertime_.

The reversed trail continues. Iwaizumi is looking at college options with Oikawa in the library; he is being pointed at by his best friend who is running after the ball in the air, desperate to ensure it stays in. They're staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars in Oikawa's ceiling; they're mourning a loss against Shiratorizawa; celebrating a win against Karasuno. 

Iwaizumi is watching Oikawa get confessed to; dragging him out by the collar from the gymnasium; walking home with him with a particularly starry sky spanning endlessly above them; celebrating someone's birthday.

And suddenly, the images flash by faster, but somehow Iwaizumi still knows what they are. They are all his memories with Oikawa, and he doesn't realize he's crying until a salty droplet enters his open mouth.

A ten year old Iwaizumi is carrying Oikawa grumpily on his back, who's crying because of a scraped knee. Oikawa is handing Iwaizumi a Godzilla action figure on his birthday. They're lying on the grass, breathless from chasing each other around. They're taking shelter in a park shed from the rain. Oikawa is poking the crease between Iwaizumi's forehead to get him to look less agitated. Iwaizumi is placing a cicada in a glass jar, while Oikawa is yelling. Oikawa is crying because Iwaizumi fell off a tree. 

Iwaizumi turns his head to Oikawa, who's sitting up now, eyes following the spinning images. He gasps, and Death grins. The older boy tears his gaze from the flashes and throws his arms around Oikawa, who wraps his around his torso. He doesn't say anything, only squeezes tight for the last time. He's hoping it's only the last time for a while. A very short while.

Oikawa knows what's happening somehow. He knows that their world is ending, and he's holding on to the boy who saved his life with every fiber of his being. The whirlwind around them shows a little boy behind his mom staring curiously at another boy who has a frown on his face.

Then, Iwaizumi pulls away, looks at Oikawa and smiles sadly. He grips his shoulders tight, nodding at him.

"I'm sorry, Oikawa, I should have stayed. I never should have gone home early, I-I-"

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa breathes, tears falling down his scar-ridden face. He shakes his head gently "Thank you. For everything." 

And the world around them disappears, and Iwaizumi is no longer gripping Oikawa, but thin air. He shuts his eyes tight, mind only displaying a fair-skinned boy with brown eyes, before suddenly, it goes blank, and he wakes up in an altered universe.


	2. Unmei

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'll see you around," Oikawa picks up his bag from the ground, swinging it on his shoulders. He looks at Iwaizumi once again, beaming. "Thanks for today, Iwa-chan."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so according to google translate, in japanese, shi means death, unmei means fate and jikan means time. 
> 
> If any of you are fluent and think otherwise, feel free to correct my dumb ass

Somewhere in a different realm, Shi is sitting on a boat, creating ripples in the water with a thin finger. That's when he sees a reflection, and he raises his head to see...an old friend.

With a flick of his wrist, Shi is on the grass by the lake, a grin on his thin face as he nods in acknowledgement to Unmei. _Fate_.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" 

"A lot of spirits are mad at you right now." She speaks gently, and a cool breeze blows her brown hair away from her fair face.

"Well, that's a given." Shi chimes, sitting down.

"I'll have you know I'm one of them." Unmei narrows her brown eyes, sitting down beside him. "Not only did you mess with time, which Jikan is furious about, by the way, but you also altered events." She pauses, shuffling in her spot. "Events that I made happen."

Shi smiles mischievously, running a hand through his hair. "I brought him back, didn't I?" 

"None of us care that you went against your own laws. You didn't need to defy ours in the process." Unmei glares, mouth downturned. 

"You'll get over it." Shi waves off. "If anything, I made things more interesting." 

Unmei stands up, brushing off debris from her back. "Oikawa Tooru and Iwaizumi Hajime were always fated to meet. By changing the chain of events, you changed the lives of many others." 

"It's a good thing you're the one in charge of that, then." 

"Whatever you were trying to achieve, Shi, can only last for so long. They're bound to meet again, and so will Hinata Shoyou and Kageyama Tobio." Unmei declares, face stoic. 

Shrugging, Shi stands up too. "You misunderstand. I have no motives other than amusement."

This earns Shi a burning glare, and he raises his arms in mock surrender as he takes a step back, only half playfully.

"Just so you know," Shi clears his throat to appear more composed, "I had nothing to do with Hinata Shoyou and Kageyama Tobio."

"Umpteen years and you still don't know a thing about interconnected occurances." 

Again, he shrugs. A chilling air brushes past them, taking with it the scent of dried leaves and detached souls. Unmei shivers.

"Like I said," Death walks towards the edge of the water. "Not my headache."

"By returning one life, you ruined four. Just once, why couldn't you let them be? Oikawa Tooru could've been brought back to life without the conditions you attached."

"Where would the fun in that be?"

"I will return them back to normalcy." Unmei states boldly. There's a distinct flame in her eyes that is uncharacteristic for a spirit so gentle.

Death doesn't bother worrying. At the end of the day, the more the input, the greater the output. "I wish you the very best." 

Unmei makes a motion to leave, when Shi calls out, "You can stop the delay of the inevitable, but you can't bring back their memories. The brain can't remember what never happened, after all." 

She smiles gracefully before vanishing, leaving a scatter of silver dust in her absence.

Shi teleports himself back to the boat, head down low as he chuckles to himself. Unmei, as tenacious as ever. Perhaps this dose of entertainment will turn out to be much more interesting than he thought. 

⏪⏪⏪⏩⏩⏩

Iwaizumi stares out the window, gazing at the clouds float by lethargically, covering and uncovering the golden sun. The sky is a pale blue, and the color swims in Iwaizumi's eyes, his mind conjuring depictions of two children chasing cicadas.

"Iwaizumi Hajime!" 

He's snapped out of his reverie and stands up as he answers, "Yes, ma'am!" 

The class chortles, and he blushes a deep red, irresolutely meeting his teacher's gaze.

Her _very agitated_ gaze. 

"Next time I expect you to answer me the first time I call out your name, alright?" 

Iwaizumi nods, mumbling an apology before sitting down. His interminable inability to focus has been growing with every passing day. He places a hand on his chest, feeling the rhythmic beat of his heart. _Thump thump thump_.

Well, it's there. But something isn't. 

He's been trying to figure out what for as long as he can remember. Maybe he's deluded, making an oak tree out of a bonsai. Maybe what he feels is something everyone else feels. This... void he feels in his chest, maybe it's nothing at all. Maybe maybe maybe.

Then why is everyone around him so unphased? Or are they just better at hiding it?

"You okay, Iwaizumi-kun?" Sugawara whispers from beside him and he nods stiffly. Suga doesn't look convinced, but he lets the matter go.

Their history teacher drones on about ancient beliefs, and he can't find himself paying attention.

Nothing new there, though.

 

When lunch time rolls around, he's approached by Suga.

"Are you sure you're alright?" 

"Huh?" Iwaizumi asks in confusion, but remembers the occurance from earlier. "Oh, yeah, don't worry about it." 

Suga's glance lingers for a few seconds before he exhales, placing a hand on Iwaizumi's shoulder and squeezing. "If you ever need to talk, I'll be all ears." 

Iwaizumi nods, smiling in gratitude before Suga wanders off. He decides to take a walk around school then, until the bell rings.

"Iwaizumi Senpaiiiiiii!!!" he hears two voices holler and he looks back to see second years bounding towards him. He staggers backwards as Tanaka and Nishinoya stop in their tracks abruptly.

"Um, hey," he swallows, regaining balance. "What's up?"

"We heard that you were upset again." Nishinoya pipes, bouncing up and down.

"So we wanted to know what we can do to make you feel better," Tanaka adds, "because if the ace suffers, the whole team will too. And that includes Kiyoko-san."

"Also because we care about you." Nishinoya chimes.

Iwaizumi smiles fondly at them, ruffling their hairs (well, Noya's hair and Tanaka's lack thereof). "I just feel a little...off, is all. I'm not sad or anything like that, though." 

"Are you sure?" Nishinoya asks, eyes wide and a look of determination on his face. When Iwaizumi nods he mutters, "Maybe that's what's wrong with Kageyama, too."

"Yeah, Yamaguchi says he's been very distracted lately." Tanaka displays a thoughtful face. "And it's not even just in class. You missed practice yesterday, right? He kept losing focus. Kageyama! Lost focus. In _volleyball_!"

"I'd sooner expect the sun to start rising from the west than Kageyama to lose focus in volleyball." Nishinoya nods, adding to the incredulity.

"It's weird. It's like he was out of place."

_Out of place._

Iwaizumi ponders over the words, thinking just how much they apply to him as well. Ever since he turned five, he's been expecting something, but he doesn't know _what_. 

"Everyone has their off-days." Iwaizumi brushes off. "The bell will ring soon. You two should get back to class." 

They salute him before walking off, two energetic bodies emanating gleeful noises with every purposeful step. Iwaizumi stares at their retreating figures, and he can't shake the feeling that they're not supposed to be his allies.

 

If Iwaizumi hadn't known Kageyama's game was off yesterday, he wouldn't even suspect it.

As the setter made tosses to Tanaka, Iwaizumi was left slightly breathless at his precision. He looks down at his own palm, yearning the stinging sensation a well-hit spike leaves.

So, he asks for a toss.

And, as always, Kageyama delivers, but it doesn't leave him with a sense of exhilaration as he watches the ball slap the border of the court. It's not that his tosses aren't good. In fact, the accuracy is a little daunting. He's grown at an alarming rate ever since middle school, that much is evident.

He looks over to his partner, who holds an expression similar to the one Iwaizumi imagines he's wearing himself.

Appetency, frustration, emptiness.

 

Iwaizumi walks home from the station alone. On his way, he makes a slight detour to the forest. Leaves crunch beneath his feet as he expertly makes his way through the labyrinth of trees and other foliage. Birds chirp in harmony, and the sound rings through every crevice of the tall trees that loom over him, allowing the afternoon sun to peek through here and there. 

He nears the stream, the _wshhhh_ of the water enthralling as Iwaizumi sits down on a smooth rock. He always comes here on his 'off days'. It's not only for the serenity or the calmness it provides his mind. Sometimes he'd rather be alone in a world where he's surrounded by people that feel unfamiliar. 

It's safe to say he's been coming here a lot lately.

Taking pebbles from the shore, he flicks them over the water, watching it skitter across before plunging in. Iwaizumi thinks how he too is only skittering across a surface, living life mundanely, how nothing has been significant enough for him to for once disregard consequences and just dive in, explore everything that doesn't meet the eye of those who hold back.

He sighs, and then there's a splash and he's looking rightward to the source of the noise.

Lavender, the color of the tall boy's shirt. Iwaizumi's breath hitches in his throat, eyes seeing the red of his tie but mind only calling out, _blue_. Like endless skies and travesties, like the cry of hysteria, the inside of an ocean, like something something _something_ , but Iwaizumi just can't _remember_.

He isn't even sure if there's anything _to_ remember.

He's tossing a pebble in the air and catching it, brown hair fluttering lazily and the tips of Iwaizumi's fingers prickle ever so lightly that he has to clench his hands into fists. 

His legs make their way towards him, on their own accord, it seems. He casts somewhat of a shadow on the boy, who is crouched down, tossing pebbles into the water.

This grabs his attention because he looks to his left, head tilting back to look at Iwaizumi. With big brown eyes and flushed cheeks his face reminds Iwaizumi of a porcelain doll. 

His mouth parts slightly as he squints, or maybe even stares in focus. He stands up, wiping his hands on his slacks.

He's taller than Iwaizumi.

"You're..." The brunet mumbles, but doesn't say anything else.

Iwaizumi is snapped out of his thoughts, so he takes a step back. "You're not very good at skipping rocks, are you?" 

The boy looks scandalized for a second but regains his composure as he smiles easily. "You noticed." 

Iwaizumi nods, leaning down to take a pebble from the ground. He throws it across the surface of the clear water with a smooth flick of his wrist and the boy watches with mouth agape as it capers across the top of the water.

"How?" He demands, pouting. For some reason, Iwaizumi's chest lightens.

"Let me see how you're doing it." 

He takes a rock, and Iwaizumi watches the graceless motion of his hand as the rock escapes his grasp and dunks into the water.

He snorts, causing the boy to scowl. 

"You're tossing the rock up. You're supposed to throw it at more of a one-eighty degree angle." he explains badly, but his apprentice seems to understand anyways because the next rock he throws _almost_ slides against the surface instead of tumbling down.

He hears the boy whine, and his chest feels a tickling sensation. Iwaizumi exhales shakily.

"Twist your body a little," he adds, delineating the motion himself. He does it slowly so that the boy can understand the motion well. Iwaizumi blushes a little under the scrutiny but clears his throat to shake it off. He hands a rock to the boy, ushering for him to try.

And his rock skips flaccidly once, before sinking into the stream, but that's good enough for a cry of happiness to escape his lips as he jumps in the air like a kid.

"Did you see that?!" He questions excitedly, eyes so alight with joy that Iwaizumi's insides feel uncharacteristically warm.

"I did. You can practice to get better." 

"One day, I will become better than you at skipping stones." The boy declares, sticking his arm out towards Iwaizumi to form a peace sign with his fingers. He winks and sticks his tongue out.

There's a sensation in Iwaizumi's entire body, like a feather was trailed down his spine, evoking a chill to run down from his head to the very atoms at the tips of his toes. Something shifts, whether inside him or just in the world in general, he doesn't know. But he feels like instead of on ground, he's standing in a puddle and he can't find himself being bothered by it. 

"Hmm, okay." Iwaizumi muses, corners of his lips tugging upwards. "Students do surpass their teachers sometimes, but the odds don't seem to be in your favor."

"Sometimes should be enough," he replies, hands by his side. "What's your name?" 

"Iwaizumi Hajime." 

The boy stares at the rock in his hand. He smiles for some reason. "Iwa. That means rock, right?" 

Iwaizumi is taken back, but nods nonetheless. 

"What are the odds?" he chuckles, tossing the rock across the stream. It skips once, before delving into the unknown. 

"What about you?" Iwaizumi asks, standing up straighter. "What's your name?"

"Oikawa Tooru." he replies, flashing him a grin. 

Iwaizumi tries the name on his tongue, surprised by the ease with which it rolls off. His chest flutters as he nods. 

"I'll see you around," Oikawa picks up his bag from the ground, swinging it on his shoulders. He looks at Iwaizumi once again, beaming. "Thanks for today, Iwa-chan." 

With that, he waves and leaves. Iwaizumi's ears ring, stomach churns and heart lashes out in his chest. He's holding his breath, but doesn't realize it. His fingers buzz, eyes stinging with what feel like tears.

Why? He doesn't know. His entire being seems to be a step ahead of his mind, and he just can't seem to catch up. He breathes in deeply, the fresh air gracing his insides which are burning. He has the sudden urge to jump into the water.

_Iwa-chan._

⏪⏪⏪⏩⏩⏩

"That was smart." Shi appears beside Unmei, who is watching Iwaizumi from on top of a tree. She's disguised herself as a silver snake, which Shi imitated. Only, his skin is a bright green.

Her reply would come out as a hiss to mortal ears, but Shi can interpret the collocation, "All endings are beginnings, after all."

Shi laughs heartily, eyes on the boy with the now red face. "I'll hand it to you, Unmei, the rocks, the river, you're quite the poet."

Unmei merely smiles. Her eyes follow the retrieving body of Iwaizumi Hajime, whose heart she knows is fluttering. Whose senses are definitely luminescent, outshining the comparatively dormant mind. 

_You're naive, Shi_ , Unmei thinks. _You erased the memories from his brain, forgetting that it's not the only part of him that can bear memories._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was this okay? IDK??? lemme know :D


	3. Cherry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We meet again." 
> 
> "So it seems."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi again! i want to thank you guys for the support so far :) it really does mean a lot. especially the comments (i was squealing at them at like four in the morning istg).
> 
> i forgot to mention that this book was inspired by the song 'hole in my heart's by luke friend. it's such a nice song, and i recommend giving it a listen.
> 
> without further ado, i hope you enjoy this chapter (and maybe leave a comment if you're feeling it????)

_The arrival of spring dots the park air with pastel pinks, as cherry blossom petals glide in the air gracefully. There is a lull of conversation in the atmosphere, the sun casting a calmly glow on Iwaizumi's brown skin._

_He's beside his mother, who is talking to their to-be-neighbor. Well, one of them. The female lead of the house._

_Iwaizumi lowers his head from looking up at her, his eyes now levelled to her legs which are grasped by a boy his size peeking at him from behind her._

_His skin is milky white, cheeks tinted pink like the cherry blossom, hair brown like the bark. Iwaizumi scowls at him. The boy inches away slightly, hiding himself further._

_His mother only casts him a casual glance before beaming at Iwaizumi, who blushes._ She's pretty.

Iwaizumi wakes up. His whole body is abuzz, and he looks out his window to meet the window of his neighbor and all he can think is, the floral curtains should be navy with small, white stars.

But why is he thinking that? His head feels like it's going to explode, and his heart is thrashing in his chest like a wild animal. He goes down the stairs to grab a glass of water, quenching his dry throat and warm insides. His fingertips prickle again, and he has the urge to run them through...something.

He tugs at the root of his hair. He's always felt restless, but why has it become so incessant all of a sudden? Why has he been restless in the first place? His life feels like a test paper he didn't study for. Hell, it's one he didn't even _know_ about.

Iwaizumi wants to scream at the top of his lungs and cry silently at the same time. He wants to bolt around the sun-stained street and lie in a cocoon of blankets. He wants to be alone, yet with someone.

_Someone, someone, someone._

His heart beat begins to calm down as he takes in deep breaths, gripping the edge of the kitchen counter so tight that his knuckles turn white. He checks the time on the microwave.

4:41 am

 _Oh, what the hell_ , he thinks as he takes a jacket from the rack by the front door, putting on a random pair of shoes before running, running, running towards the forest, the stream, his quiet place.

He can't help but feel like something is adding to his fervor, to his desperation to just exist placidly.

And so he is running on the gravel, caressed by the gentle sun of the dusk. For more reasons unknown, tears are streaming down his face as he is doing so and he is crying silently, alone in a world where everyone seems to be in place and at peace. 

 

He reaches the stream, huffing as he bends down to regain his breath. Without thinking, he stands up straight, taking a deep breath before letting go.

Letting go of his current frustrations, his tangled emotions, of everything as he yells what may as well be endlessly, his voice hovering in the atmosphere for a mere second before vanishing with the song of the surrounding birds. 

He feels marginally better as he sits down then, just looking up at the pastel sky above him. He enjoys his solitude for ten minutes before the scrunching of leaves alert his attention and he's snapping his head back to the direction of the sound.

Patiently, he waits, mind listing all the possible animals that this forest is home to.

It turns out to be a human being after all, and his stomach dips lower than its capacity should allow at the sight of the brown haired boy clad in a blue sweatshirt. The chest holds an alien patch.

Iwaizumi, surprisingly, smiles and the burning sensation in his body cools down to a comfortable warmth. A pleasant warmth.

When Oikawa's eyes land on Iwaizumi, he yelps, jumping back slightly in surprise. Iwaizumi finds himself chuckling.

Frowning with a glare, Oikawa advances him. Iwaizumi's gaze doesn't move, and his smile doesn't falter. The grumpy teen sits down beside Iwaizumi, making eye contact. His frown is replaced with a smile bright enough to cause vertigo, but it's still alluring.

"We meet again." 

"So it seems." Iwaizumi breathes, relaxing. He flicks a rock across the surface of the water and Oikawa follows it's trail.

"May I ask why you're out in a forest this early?" 

"Some may call it late," is Iwaizumi's reply. Oikawa doesn't look amused, though his eyes tell a different story. He raises his eyebrows, and Iwaizumi gives in. "I felt restless. Couldn't sleep, so, I don't know. My legs seemed to have a mind of their own."

Oikawa stays silent for a moment, looking out across the gushing waters. He closes his eyes, relenquishing the hum of the forest. 

"What's your excuse?" Iwaizumi breaks the silence in a soft voice.

Opening his eyes, Oikawa smirks, eyes scintillating with mischief. "Would you believe me if I used your excuse?" 

Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow questioningly before shaking his head.

Oikawa shrugs. "It's true, though. I - uh, had these weird tho- my head seemed to be spinning. But not dizzyingly. It was, I don't know, spiralling with thoughts, I guess." 

Iwaizumi absorbs the cluster of words, somehow understanding exactly what he means. He lays back on the damp ground strewn with the morning dew.

"I've never seen you here. Before yesterday, that is." 

"I'm new here. I moved to this part of town two days ago and, well... yestersay I had the overwhelming urge to explore." He runs a hand through his messy hair. It somehow still looks stylish. "Which is weird. I'm not very outdoorsy, yet I made my way through the forest as if my legs had seen a map of it before," he stretches before continuing, "I'd say eyes, but really, my mind was trying to catch up with my actions."

It's surreal how much he can relate with this guy. Listening to this makes him feel slightly at ease.

"I weirdly know what you mean."

"I sure hope so, because otherwise I'd sound like a lunatic." Oikawa snorts sarcastically, lying on his back as well. He isn't very close to Iwaizumi as far as proximity goes, but it's still overwhelmingly comforting.

"You know," Oikawa mumbles, eyes following the drifting clouds, "I can't help but think that jacket would suit you much better if it were white." 

Instinctively, Iwaizumi looks down at the jacket he offhandedly took on his way out. He's wearing his Karasuno Volleyball Club jacket. He tries imagining himself in white, and can't really tell much of a difference.

"I do...I don't know where that came from, I'm sorry." Oikawa covers his face in embarrassment.

Iwaizumi chortles softly, eyes drooped lazily as he takes in the gentle colors of the morning sky. "Don't be. It's fine. I feel like life would be normal under lots of different circumstances anyways."

The words leave his mouth before he even realizes. He furrows his eyebrows, mentally berating himself for 1) being so impulsive and 2) not putting a filter between his brain and mouth when speaking to someone he met not even twnety four hours ago.

A cool breeze blows by, and with it comes a flurry of leaves, from both the ground and on top of branches. Iwaizumi closes his eyes, pondering over how at ease he feels at this very moment.

"What do you mean?" Oikawa asks, shielding his eyes from the dust particles that raise with the wind. Iwaizumi does the same.

He's about to say _nevermind, I'm just sputtering nonsense_ , but he knows he isn't. And he kind of wants Oikawa to know anyways.

"I- well, I just feel a little out of place, I guess. Like I should be somewhere different, or have someone with me, but I don't know where or who or _why_. Life feels a little artificial." 

From the corner of his eyes, Iwaizumi can see Oikawa's head turned towards him. He's fumbling with his fingers on his stomach, bottom lip between his teeth.

"A cherry tree among pine." Oikawa murmurs, and Iwaizumi almost doesn't hear it. He only looks at him to gesture for him to elaborate. "It's...something my mom always says. I think it's meant to be a metaphor for uniqueness or something like that, but," he pauses, and brown eyes meet Iwaizumi's steely gray ones. "it sounds more like loneliness, doesn't it? A cherry blossom among pine trees. Out of place, without a companion."

The words swim around Iwaizumi's head, scattering across his brain, poking at every crevice.

Is Iwaizumi lonely? Or is he just missing something? 

A companion. Could it be he yearns for a girlfriend? He shakes his head at the thought. He's received a decent amount of confessions before, even been in a relationship or two. The hole in his heart never faltered, though. 

So, he doesn't reply. He enjoys the comforting silence that ensues between them, the rustling of trees caused by the breeze that carries with it the scent of damp earth and foliage. The murmur of the water adds to the melody, the slowly brightening sky creating a spotlight for the performers. 

 

When the sun is up high enough to drench the sky with a whiteness that indicates it's time for most people to wake up, Iwaizumi stands up. He pats dust off his back, pebbles sinking beneath his feet. Oikawa mirrors his movement. 

"Oh, are we leaving?" he asks, eyes dropping.

Something about his question makes Iwaizumi's stomach churns as he folds his jacket absentmindedly. He nods as a reply, glad at the potential prospect for company some of the way back home. 

"My parents wake up pretty early. They'll freak out if they don't see me in my room. I didn't bring my phone either." he explains as they begin walking through the forest. Their steps are weirdly in sync.

Oikawa nods in acknowledgement. His cheeks are flushed from the cool morning air.

Something flashes by Iwaizumi's eyes but it's too quick to make out.

He shakes the particles of the thought away.

He tilts his head back to stare up at the looming trees, the branches spreading more upwards than sideways. Still, the sheer multitude of trees seems to be enough to cast most of the ground with shadows.

"What trees do you reckon these are?" Iwaizumi asks Oikawa, who descerns them. 

A small smile makes its way into his lips as he glances at Iwaizumi with a mellow gaze and says, "Pine. Most of these are Japanese red pine." 

 

Oikawa stops first, and Iwaizumi realizes he lives just five minutes away. They bid their goodbyes before Iwaizumi makes his way to his own house.

The day is still young. Iwaizumi manages to avoid his parents as he silently creeps up to his room, where he wraps himself up in a cacoon of blankets before closing his eyes.

'Like I should be somewhere different, or have someone with me' Iwaizumi had said. A shiver runs down his spine as he realizes that not once at the stream today did he feel that way. 

⏪⏪⏪⏩⏩⏩

"Tanaka, nice serve." 

"Nice receive, Noya." 

Iwaizumi makes his way to the front of the court as the ball reaches Kageyama's fingertips. As he jumps, the ball is right there, where he always wants it, and he slams it down on the other side of the net, past two blockers.

"Nice kill, Iwaizumi!" Daichi praises from behind him, and he flashes him a smile. He looks over to the setter, who holds a neutral look. His navy eyes look dim. As always.

"That toss was perfect, Kageyama." Iwaizumi compliments to raise his spirit. He gets a nod in return, and he knows he got his message across. But just like him, no matter how perfect the toss or the spike, something just isn't there.

 

"Alright, gather up!" Coach Ukai claps his hands together, the noise reverberating through the gymnasium. The team haphazardly makes a circle around him. "Well done today, boys. There's definitely progress."

"Thank you, Coach!" The boys chorus.

Coach Ukai falters for a moment, blushing. "Anyways, Sensei has just informed me that he's arranged a practice match. With a powerhouse school, at that." With that, he gestures for Takeda Sensei to speak.

"Tomorrow, you will all be facing one of Miyagi's most skilled volleyball teams. So, after school, we'll be going to Aoba Johsai instead of coming to the gym."

Everyone makes a noise of acknowledgement.

Coach Ukai takes over once more. "Do your stretches and be sure to get plenty of rest for tomorrow." 

With that, everyone scatters off to perform their daily stretches.

"Oy, Noya!" Ennoshita calls, grabbing the libero's attention. "Don't you know the setter from Aoba Johsai?"

Noya grins, nodding his head energetically before ensuing his blabbering about some extremely skilled setter who used to go to the same middle school as him. From the corner of his eyes, Iwaizumi notices Kageyamas eyes light ablaze.

He slaps his back. "You'll show him, I just know it." 

Kageyama nods, determination painting his face. He smiles at the setter he's known since his third year in middle school, and finishes stretching. He's heard of Aoba Johsai, but never played against them. Takeda Sensei must've really gotten the big guns out for persuading them to play a practice match with Karasuno.

 

Later that night, Fate lay on Iwaizumi's windowsill. A ladybug this time. She's grinning as Iwaizumi is staring at his ceiling. In the distance can be heard the chirp of crickets and cicadas. 

"Someone's in a good mood." Shi appears beside her, mimicking her form once again. She's too happy to make a snide remark.

"I made a discovery today, my dear Shi. Turns out, you're not the monster I thought you were." 

Shi raises his eyebrows, well, theoretically, as he looks at Unmei with calculating eyes. "Are you sure you're not mistaken?"

"Positive." She beams. "I was checking the record of recent curses today." 

That's enough for Shi to understand because he's smiling to himself. "It seems that my secret is out." 

"I'm surprised you managed to pull it off."

"Don't affront me like that. We're both spirits of the inevitable. Doubting me is doubting yourself."

"Hmm, but to think of something so elaborate in the span of what, five minutes? I've got to hand it to you. That was pretty impressive."

Shi snorts.

"Is that why they're back to being seventeen?"

Shi doesn't reply. His eyes drag over Iwaizumi, who's breathing unevenly. A sign that he's still awake.

"He's thinking about it." Shi says at last. "About Aoba Johsai. He seems quite excited."

Unmei simpers, slight fondness bubbling in her chest. "He's not just excited, though. He feels like he's about to go home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what'd you think of this chapter? what would you like to see in the next chapter? it'd be great if you could share, because i really want to improve myself. 
> 
> other than that, i hope you had/are having a great day :D and if you didn't/aren't, there's always tomorrow and i hope you do soon （⌒_⌒）
> 
> -aris


	4. Invincible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suddenly, he feels invincible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please read the note at the end of the chapter it's kinda important :)

_Stars, lots of them._

_Iwaizumi's mouth is parted as he's appreciating the constellations he helped put up, and his mouth forms a breathy, "uwah!"_

_The room is darkened further when a little boy pulls his blinds closer together, blocking out the vestige of sunlight that was peaking through from the setting orb outside._

_He feels the mattress sink as the boy climbs up, and they're laying side by side to witness the scattered glow-in-the-dark stars with great enthrallment._

_It's only an addition to the evergrowing space collection owned by this boy. Iwaizumi turns his head to the side to glance at the navy curtains with white stars. He snickers._

And then he wakes up.

Punching the off button on the shrill alarm clock, he sits up groggily in bed, a stiff yawn escaping his lips. 

Iwaizumi stares out his window, and his tire is immediately retreating, replaced with gnawing astonishment.

The floral curtains he'd seen not even a week ago, now navy.

_With white stars._

 

"Iwaizumi-san!" Noya bursts through the door of his class a minute after the final bell rings. Iwaizumi looks up from packing his bag, his eyes not the only pair on the gleeful libero.

"Oh, hey," he greets, swinging his bag around his shoulder and advancing towards the door.

"Let's go! I saw Takeda Sensei get in the bus from upstairs."

"Speaking of which," Iwaizumi smiles in amusement. "Isn't your class two floors up? How did you get here so quick?" 

"I got out early." He replies casually, causing Iwaizumi to arch a brow.

"How so?" 

"I told Sensei I have to go to the bathroom."

"Did you actually?"

Nishinoya shakes his head, causing the lock of blonde hair to swing along with it. "Nope."

"And your bag?" 

"Ryu should get it." 

Iwaizumi clicks his tongue as they climb down the stairs, placing a hand on Nishinoya's shoulder. "Don't miss class. You can't afford your grades slipping."

That earns him a pout, and then there's a sound of something toppling to the floor.

"Ah, sh-I'm sorry!" Noya scrambles down to pick up the mop from the floor. Iwaizumi trails his eyes towards the holder of the cleaning supply, eyes landing on a tall third year with a tight bun.

Azumane Asahi.

"Oh, it's, uh it's okay. I'm sorry, I w-wasn't loo-"

"Don't apologize, Asahi-san!" Noya interrupts, handing him the mop. His gaze lingers on it for a second too long. 

"Sorry." He mumbles, and Noya narrows his eyes, and Asahi grins in embarrassment.

His attention turns to Iwaizumi, and the two share an amicable nod of acknowledgement before the three resume walking once more.

"I wish he'd join the club again." Iwaizumi comments offhandedly, reminiscing last year, when Asahi was still part of the volleyball club.

The second year nods, folding his hands behind his neck and staring at the ceiling. "Me too."

There's not as much vigor to those words as Iwaizumi feels there should be.

 

"Hey, Suga," Iwaizumi calls, leaning forward towards the seats Sugawara and Daichi are occupying.

The silver haired boy turns to him with his ever present smile. "Yeah?"

"Don't you think we should get Asahi-san to join the club again?"

This grabs Daichi's attention because he turns around as well. Suga smiles somewhat sadly.

"We tried talking to him. To no avail, though." replies Suga, and Daichi nods.

"But we won the match against Date Tech. He can't blame himself for anything!" Iwaizumi reasons. Yes, his spikes kept getting blocked, but that _happens._ It shouldn't matter, should it? Especially not since they _won_.

"See, I think he's convinced himself that he didn't contribute to that victory." Daichi explains, "that he just wasted the sixth man spot."

Frowning, Iwaizumi leans back. He glances to his right, to the adjacent row where Noya and Tanaka are guffawing at an annoyed Ennoshita. He feels his stomach sink momentarily before realizing that they're entering the gates of Aoba Johsai.

His heart suddenly becomes a hammer drill.

 

"There his is. His Highness." Iwaizumi picks up on the mumbles of his former kouhai, Kindaichi. He glances over at Kageyama, who's purposefully avoiding their gazes while glaring daggers at the floor. 

Iwaizumi arches his eyebrows at the boy with wildly spiked hair, daring him to repeat himself, feeling Tanaka beside him make ridiculous faces threateningly.

Kindaichi gulps, averting his eyes to the ground before both teams bow down and wish each other a good game.

"Hinata is taking a make up test, but where is _he?_ " 

"Held up again. You know how it is. They keep increasing in number every two hours, I swear." 

Curiosity pokes at Iwaizumi's forehead at the conversation between the coach and the assistant. Their conversation sounds. . . morbid, sort of.

"I wish we had someone to keep him grounded." The coach sighs as the whistle blows, and a tall, dark haired boy with particularly thick eyebrows serves. 

Nishinoya receives it, and the game picks up pace instantly. Everyone seems focused, movements thought out. Kageyama is especially infallible.

They pick up the points quick, and Iwaizumi is reminded of the praise Seijoh's setter received from Nishinoya.

 _He's not bad_ , Iwaizumi thinks, _but he isn't especially great, either._

"Nice receive." Kageyama says softly as the ball arcs towards him. Iwaizumi positions himself, ready to jump. He spikes the ball over just as the door opens.

"Oh, thank God." The coach says, and everyone's attention turns to the entrance. Two boys enter, their heights contrasting. Iwaizumi's eyes widen with recognition at the brown haired boy talking to the redheaded one, the two seemingly teasing each other. Spectators who gathered up throughout the match squeal enthusiastically. Namely the girls.

His ears pick up a sharp intake of breath, and he realizes that it's from Kageyama. He's surprised to see the boy's mouth is parted, face dripping with shock. Could it be that he knows Oikawa, too?

No, his gaze is lower than that. At the shorter boy with fiery hair and almost tangible excitement.

Seijoh's coach calls a time out, and everyone makes their way outside the court, Iwaizumi's pace especially slow as his attention is focused on the newcomers. Well, one of them anyways.

 

Oikawa doesn't notice him till after the timeout ends, his eyes seemingly trailing to look for someone. When they land on the number four on Iwaizumi's torso, they trail higher and widen with recognition.

Then, they narrow a little playfully as the game resumes. His brown eyes hold a spark that Iwaizumi can decipher from all the way on the other side of the net. Oikawa is smiling smug.

Two of the players have been substituted, so the genius setter is either Iwaizumi's rock-skipping apprentice or the short redhead.

"Sorry, cover!" Daichi says, and Kageyama doesn't need telling twice. He delivers a toss to Tanaka fluidly, but it manages to hit the tips of a blocker's finger. 

Iwaizumi stays alert, eyes unable to leave the redhead as he advances towards the net to jump.

Which means. . .

Oikawa tosses the ball to the redhead, and Iwaizumi jumps, unconsciously expecting a low spike. He's surprised when his opponent jumps higher than him, spiking the ball past the two-man wall.

"Tch." Tsukishima clicks his tongue. 

"Nice kill, Hinata!" A boy with light brown hair praises. Iwaizumi turns around, noting the expressions of all his teammates. Daichi, with his mouth agape, Tanaka and Nishinoya verbally expressing their astonishment, and Kageyama, stunned with lips pressed together in a tight line and navy eyes wide with emotion.

"Don't make that face, it's not like you." Tsukishima snickers at Kageyama. He doesn't seem to hear.

"Chibi-chan, nice!" Someone praises in a dulcet voice and recognizing it, Iwaizumi turns around. He can hear his pulse rise in his ears at the squinting boy with pink lips upturned.

Does he address everyone with some sort of nickname?

Hinata grins, high-fiving the setter. 

"Oy, Kageyama. I'm happy that you're showing emotion for once, but it doesn't need to show on your face permanently." 

"I-sorry, Tanaka-san."

"We'll pay them back with double the points."

 

When it's Oikawa's turn to serve, Nishinoya instructs the players in the front to move forward so he can increase his field of impact. His eyes are shining in a way that tells Iwaizumi that whatever is coming his way will be a challenge. His fingertips are wriggling, knees bent and head looking straight.

Iwaizumi is awestruck at the sheer force of the serve, hard enough for even Nishinoya Yuu to miss. It may as well have been a spike.

"Don't mind, we'll get the next one." Daichi is clapping, but Iwaizumi knows better. He raises an eyebrow at him, indicating that he's well aware Daichi is slightly intimidated. 

When Oikawa serves again, Iwaizumi can't help but watch the fluid motion, the calculated course before expertly throwing the ball in the air. The wide step before he's almost levitating in slow motion, twisting his body and arching his arm back to hit the ball with an audible _smack_.

Iwaizumi feels breathless just from watching. For the rest of the match, he's unable to peel his eyes completely away from the setter, clad in blue and white, looking like the sky on a spring day, but proving to everyone watching that he's a force to be reckoned with, a deluge on a sunny day that engulfs everyone in his path.

His fingers brush over the yellow and blue sphere airily, motion nimble and exhilarating, leaving Iwaizumi spellbound. His steely eyes soften, mesmerized as they traverse along with the sailing ball, arms twitching in anticipation, knees giving into the desire to jump, even though the toss isn't for him.

Each of his breaths are slower, longer, a gentle flow of air through a body buzzing with fire.

He's aware his limbs are moving, receiving and jumping and spiking. He's doing all of these things, but his mind is experiencing a whirlwind, a spiral of thoughts and blankness at once, an intense version of what he's gotten used to in his almost-eighteen years of existence. 

Karasuno wins three out of the five sets they play. Everyone is exhausted by that time, hungrily gulping down water and catching their breaths. Iwaizumi feels strangely at peace.

"One more!" Someone yells indignantly, turning out to be Hinata. Somehow, Iwaizumi isn't surprised.

"We played five sets. That's like two games." An emotionless voice answers.

"So? I want to play again." 

"Aren't you tired? Playing with the same set of people against the same team takes a lot out of normal human beings, usually. Everyone seems to be weary of each other." Kindaichi says this time.

"Hm, you're right, Kindaichi." Seijoh's coach muses, and he's walking over to talk to Coach Ukai.

 

"A mixed team?" Shi asks, looking over at Unmei. This time, they decided against a disguise, and are instead making themselves invisible to the human eye. 

Unmei shrugs, eyeing the teenagers. Her brown eyes sparkle as Iwaizumi puts on a navy bib, the same color as Oikawa. "This is how it was always meant to be, anyways." 

"But the libero and middle blocker were switched, too." 

"It wouldn't be a mixed match if you only exchanged one player." Unmei glares, evoking a small smirk to place itself on Shi's lips. 

He watches along with her as the teams discuss tactics, as Nishinoya Yuu and Oikawa Tooru speak like old friends. He feels the tension between Hinata and Kageyama, the tangled emotions in Iwaizumi's core. 

"You're quite the masochist, Unmei. And that's coming from _Death_."

Unmei simpers, not replying verbally. If it weren't for her, Shi would have probably gotten bored by this universe on the first day of its creation.

 

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa calls, snapping Iwaizumi out of his reverie. His limbs are prickling in a way that's making the rest of him restless. "You like your tosses to be slightly high and away from the net, right?"

Iwaizumi squints his eyes, peering at the smiling setter. "Were you really able to tell from just observing?" 

Oikawa's smile widens, and Iwaizumi's stomach churns. "Leave it to me, Iwa-chan! I'll deliver to you the best tosses you've ever received!" 

And for some reason, Iwaizumi doesn't doubt that one bit.

 

"Nice receive, Kindaichi!" 

The ball flies towards Oikawa, and Iwaizumi readies himself. He advances the net like he always does, muscle memory engraved in every movement. Yet, he feels lighter, legs jostling with catastrophic energy, arms humming with vigor. 

He hits the ball through two blockers, and electricity courses through his veins, blood rushing and palm stinging deliciously. His heart soars, his breath hitches in his throat, his entire being feels ready to take off, to vanquish.

"Nice kill!" One of Aoba Johsai's players says, but he's looking to his right, to Oikawa who is grinning, flashing his pearly whites in a way that has Iwaizumi's body feel warmer than it already is.

It's like a cloud of haze lifts from Iwaizumi's world the moment he hits the ball across the net. He's looking into warm, brown eyes, and like the day they met, something shifts. 

"Did I deliver?" Oikawa asks a little smugly, and Iwaizumi's heart takes off. 

"You did."

Suddenly, he feels invincible.

 

The match continues, with each toss to Iwaizumi increasing in accuracy. He thinks to himself that he could never get used to the feeling it leaves him with after spiking.

Watching Oikawa serve feels all the more awe-inspiring when Iwaizumi is on the same side of the court as him. Like an ally firing a gun meant to aid in their victory. A sentinel.

He shakes the thought away, eyes following the ball that Daichi manages to receive. From Kageyama's form and passive expression, he can't tell who he's going to toss to. The obvious choice would be Tanaka, but. . .

Iwaizumi follows Hinata's trail, the struggle practically futile due to his superior speed. As he jumps, his eyes are closed. Yet, he's swinging his arm, and the sight advances in slow motion. 

Iwaizumi almost shivers from the focus of Kageyama's eyes, how they almost glisten as he tosses the ball to the boy in front of Iwaizumi, both of them in mid-air.

His eyes are closed, how does he expect to know which way to swing? 

Iwaizumi's reach is only an inch below Hinata's, and he expects himself to stop his spike. In fact, he expects the kid to miss it.

But no, just as he swings, the ball comes in contact with his palm, eyes still closed. Iwaizumi suppresses a gasp as the ball hits the wooden floor, followed by a stunned silence.

_What the hell was that?_

"UWAAHHH!" Hinata yells, jumping towards Kageyama, who's staring down at his palms in surprise. "That wa- you j- UWAH!" 

"He wasn't looking." Oikawa mutters from behind him, his eyes are wide with shock. He saw it too, then.

Iwaizumi nods stiffly, glancing at Kageyama. Everyone is looking at the aloof setter, who's looking at the boy he just tossed to.

Did he send the ball directly to Hinata's point of impact?

"Was that a fluke?" Nishinoya appears beside Iwaizumi, who shrugs to say he doesn't know.

"If it wasn't, Kageyama just got a whole lot scarier." Iwaizumi comments, then instinctively looks at Oikawa. 

The air of confidence around him seems to have faltered, and for reasons unknown Iwaizumi wants to return it. 

So, he lightly flicks his temple and mumbles, "You better help me get that point back."

To this, Oikawa straightens his posture, eyes dazzling with determination that has Iwaizumi wanting to find shelter. He feels the same sensation of standing in a puddle like the day they met. Only now, it's deeper because of the storm that is Oikawa Tooru.

"You better score."

This has Iwaizumi smiling while walking back to his position. He's smiling even wider when he spikes Oikawa's toss across the net, and immediately high-fives him. They promised, they complied, and now they're celebrating. It feels familiar, yet like a distant wish coming true.

 

"Your upper hand receives are so good! Were you ever a setter?" Nishinoya tumbles down into a conversation with the other team's libero as Iwaizumi wipes his face with a towel. Kageyama is beside him, drinking water with a passive look on his face. His eyes are focused, and following his gaze Iwaizumi is unsurprised to see them on Hinata.

He's running with the net in his arms, on the verge of frolicking. This results in a bit of the material to fall due to the bounce in his steps, causing him to trip.

He's quick to get up, however, pretending like nothing happened at all.

Kageyama exhales, and Iwaizumi almost drops the towel from his hands at what happens next.

Exhaling through his nose, Kageyama mutters, "dumbass," and places his water bottle on the bench. Upon closer inspection, it can be seen that his lips hold a surreptitious smile.

"NOYA, LOOK AT THIS!" Tanaka ushers his best friend over, obviously having noticed the expression on Kageyama's face. The two proceed in prodding at the setter, and Iwaizumi leaves them to it with a shake of his head.

Daichi and Suga will get them.

 

"Make sure you don't leave anything behind." Takeda Sensei instructs as Iwaizumi helps load the bus with their belongings. He hands Yamaguchi the last bag, before walking to coach Ukai.

"You played well." Ukai compliments, and receives a thanks from the spiker. 

"Will we be discussing anything else?" He asks, and Ukai shakes his head. "Then I'll be taking my leave, coach. My house is closer from here than Karasuno."

"Alright then. Take care, Iwaizumi-kun." 

Iwaizumi bows, before letting his teammates know.

"Well done today, Iwaizumi." Suga slaps his back.

"Hmm." Daichi says, grinning. "Especially the last few sets."

"Have you played with him before? With Oikawa-san?" Suga questions, and Daichi looks just as eager to know.

"Erm, no." Iwaizumi rubs the back of his neck. It's warm

"Really? You two seemed to be perfectly in sync."

That's what replays in Iwaizumi's head as he's making his way out the gate, and towards his house.

He felt a bit like that too, and he can't wrap his head around it. Kageyama has been his setter for a year in his old school, and they've practiced with each other countless times. Yet hitting Oikawa's tosses felt like second nature, like his muscles had memorized the arc, the speed, the position and everything beyond and in between of Oikawa's tosses.

 _Not just his tosses_ , though, Iwaizumi thinks. It's his tendencies, too. His steps, his calculations, his ardency. 

He shakes the thought away, tilting his head upwards to gaze at the pink sky stretching out above him like an endless blanket. The hum of his general surroundings comfort him, and his body relaxes uncharacteristically for going through a path for the first time.

He thinks he hears footsteps make their way towards him, but he doesn't pay any mind to it. Not until someone taps his right shoulder.

He turns his head to the left, almost instinctively.

 _Why?_ He had absolutely no reason to look left when the contact came from the right. 

Oikawa is looking at him with scrunched up eyebrows, lips jutted out into a pout.

"How did you know?!" He whines.

How _did_ he know?

"I, uh, I didn't." He mumbles, their steps falling in sync almost instantly. "I guess I reacted wrong."

"That doesn't seem likely. You have really good reflexes." Oikawa notes. A soft breeze blows his hair lucidly. 

Iwaizumi's fingers prickle again. He clenches his palms into fists.

"Thanks." The shorter boy mumbles. "How long have you played volleyball?" 

"Hmm, more than half my life." Oikawa replies with a honeyed voice. Iwaizumi closes his eyes momentarily, relinquishing the air and everything it holds.

"That much was evident." He comments offhandedly.

"What about Iwa-chan? I get the feeling you've played for a long time, too."

"Since I was eight." 

"Well, what do you know. Me too." Oikawa hums. "Are you a third year? I heard of Karasuno's scary third year spiker. But you don't look scary to me." A pause. "Well, not _too_ scary."

The teasing tone has Iwaizumi clenching his hands for completely different reasons. He reckons it's too early to hit him. They haven't known each other all that long, after all. So, he settles for a glare.

It makes the other boy grin before sticking out his tongue. Iwaizumi decides Oikawa's smiles are injurious to his health. He stares at the floor.

"I _am_ a third year, yes. You probably heard of Asahi. He's not scary, though. Just really big, and people tend to take his appearance as threatening but really he's the least harmful of all the third years. Of everyone in the team, for that matter."

"Where was he today?" 

"He, uh, had a bad experience in the last tournament and quit the club." he says despondently. An athlete as talented as Asahi no longer playing is truly a shame. 

"He'll be back." Oikawa states, staring ahead. His facial features are relaxed, no trace of artificiality. It's calming to look at, somehow.

"What makes you say that?" 

"Did he love playing volleyball?" 

Iwaizumi thinks about it for a second. He finally replies by saying, "he did."

Oikawa shrugs, running a hand through his hair. It looks lighter with the sun casting it's glow onto it. "You can't stay away from the things you love for too long. He'll be back." 

Oikawas eyes meet his at the last three words. They wrap around his torso and enter his chest, where his heart thumps; lacing around his stomach, which carries a blazing flame. Thunder could erupt near them, a star could come crashing down, rain could pour in torrents but Iwaizumi won't notice. For Oikawa is looking at him knowingly with that same smirk as earlier, with the aura of sureness and just something else that is unconquerable, and as it seems, when that happens, Iwaizumi feels truly invincible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yooo so i started my igcse exams today, and it'll continue till the ninth of june. so far i've updated every 2-4 days, but for a while updates may be a little irregular.
> 
> (knowing me tho i'll probs end up procrastinating studying by writing lmao who knows)
> 
> either ways i hope you guys understand. as always, let me know what you thought of the chapter. ٩(^ᴗ^)۶
> 
> BTW HOW DO YOU FEEL LIKE A KAGEHINA SPINOFF??? LET ME KNOW CUZ I KINDA SORTA WANNA WRITE IT???


	5. Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _This_ , Iwaizumi thinks, _must be what immersion is like._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, i tend to write in wattpad, and there's a dedication option there to enable writers to dedicate each chapter to a different person. i'm fairly new to ao3, and am not fully familiar with the features, but i don't think there's a dedication option??? (correct me if i'm wrong) so i'll do it manually
> 
> thank you so much @hinata_ora for all your wonderful comments so far. i love that you point out specific details and your endless motivation is just incredible, so shoutout to you! 
> 
> i know i say this every chapter but i do appreciate all of your comments. the positivity is unbelievable so thank you all <3

"I'm hungry, Iwa-chan!" Oikawa whines. 

Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow, gazing at the lean boy walking beside him. "What do you expect me to do about that?" 

Huffing, Oikawa checks his phone. It surprises Iwaizumi how fast his lips turn up to a smile. "Let's go get ramen! Maki and Matsun are there right now."

"Who?" Iwaizumi narrows his eyes, trying to recall if these two have been mentioned. He thinks Maki is the name of the boy with light brown hair from earlier.

"My teammates? Ugh, that's not important! What's important is that they're having ramen and I want some too."

Iwaizumi is about to decline the offer, because really, he's never spoken to these guys before. He hasn't even spoken to Oikawa that much. Walking home together just happened to be a coincidence. Taking a spontaneous detour to eat with people he barely knows isn't exactly on Iwaizumi's list of things to do to have a good time.

He is hungry, though. But he can always eat at home. So, he says, "You go on ahead, then."

Oikawa clicks his tongue and frowns. They've stopped walking now, and something tells Iwaizumi that he won't be heading home when they start walking again. 

"Do you not like ramen?" 

"It's not that. Won't it be weird if I intrude?" 

"Intruding and joining are two different things." Oikawa argues, stance stoic. Iwaizumi has the sudden urge to laugh. It's like standing in front of a very tall five year old.

"You don't have to worry about things like that, Iwa-chan. I'll be there. It'll be fun." 

_I'll be there._

The words feel like yarn that slowly wrap around Iwaizumi to provide him with warmth and solace. Oikawa is peering at him with eyes screaming reassurance, letting him know that he meant every word.

"We don't have all day~" Oikawa sing-songs and catches Iwaizumi off guard as he wraps his slender fingers around Iwaizumi's wrist and tugs him along towards a destination unknown to the wide-eyed boy.

He follows nonetheless. Mostly because he isn't given much of a choice, but also because a part of him - albeit small (or rather, undiscovered) - is crying out with a hoarse voice telling him to go. Social situations don't really faze Iwaizumi. He lives in a world where everyone feels like strangers after all. Small talk, if nothing else, is definitely a skill he's attained over the years.

So, with Oikawa's hand on his wrist, he takes each step with less hesitance than the one prior. The path ahead blurs out slightly, and his eyes are riveted to the back of his companion, guiding him with sheer determination.

 _This_ , Iwaizumi thinks, _must be what immersion is like._

 

They stop in front of a traditional style ramen shop, relatively empty due to it not quite being evening time yet. They enter, and the warm, savory air instantly has Iwaizumi salivating. 

Oikawa, having let go of Iwaizumi's wrist once they reached, nudges him to make their way towards Oikawa's friends.

"Finally." The brown haired boy, Maki, chimes. His eyes then land on Iwaizumi. "Hey, you're number four."

"Sorry for intruding." He says politely, sitting down beside Oikawa, who clicks his tongue.

"We're the ones who are sorry. That you had to make acquaintances with this idiot, out of all people." The other boy says.

Iwaizumi can't help but chuckle, the sound escaping his chest and filling the air around them. It grows slightly louder when Oikawa glares at the perpetrator.

"I'm a great friend, thank you very much." He declares indignantly.

"You're not fooling anybody." Makki snorts, advancing a hand towards Iwaizumi. "Hanamaki Takahiro."

"Oh, crap I forgot to do that." The other guys says as Iwaizumi shakes Hanamaki's hand. "Matsukawa Issei. You can call me Matsun."

He shakes his hand as well, while saying, "Iwaizumi Hajime."

"HOLD UP," Hanamaki slaps the table in front of him lightly. It earns him a glare from the cook regardless. "Don't tell me you're the precious _Iwa-chan._ "

Iwaizumi raises his eyebrows, eyes falling in a fidgety Oikawa. Precious?

"LeT'S ORDER, MAKKI, MATSUN, IWA-C-IZUMI-SAN." Oikawa bursts out before Iwaizumi can ask anything. He glares along with the chef at Oikawa, obviously have caused quite the disturbance.

The two boys guffaw as Oikawa turns positively red. After they order, Iwaizumi is quick to ask.

"What is it?"

Oikawa tries protesting, but Iwaizumi just places a firm hand over his mouth. The two boys look at each other in amusement.

"Nothing in particular, really. Our _darling_ Tooru has just been talking about you quite a bit for the past few days." Hanamaki explains, grinning.

"We thought you were a girl he's infatuated with, really. Some sort of professional rock thrower or whatever." Matsukawa continues, flashing Oikawa a mocking smile. Iwaizumi feels his persistent attempt to escape fade as he eases into the iron grip.

"You'd always come up somehow in conversations. _I wonder if Iwa-chan plays volleyball. He did have an athletic jacket on the other day_." Hanamaki mimics the last sentence in what Iwaizumi is guessing is Oikawa's voice. 

" _Maybe tennis. That would make sense, too._ " Matsukawa adds, in the same mocking voice. 

"Don't ask us why he thought it would make sense. We really don't know."

Iwaizumis chest feels the vibration of his heart, blood rushing and stomach flickering. His insides feel warm and light as the slowly building laugh escapes his throat airiy, and he's squinting and blushing all at the same time.

He finally removes his palm from over Oikawa's mouth. He realizes that his fair skin is tinted pink, and it makes Iwaizumi's heart thrum all the more.

"They exaggerated it." The boy mutters, not making eye contact. "I was just excited about learning how to make rocks skip on water." 

"That's quite a long lasting excitement." Matsukawa snickers. 

Iwaizumi's laugh dies down to a light smile. He feels the energy in the air, one that has his insides humming joyously. His pulse is back to a normal speed, but it's different somehow. Less... forced.

"Maybe I was just happy to make a friend who isn't an asshole, unlike you two." Oikawa Huff's, turning his head towards the food presented in front of him. 

_Friend._

So, Oikawa considers him his friend? 

The smile turns to a beam, and Iwaizumi turns around to his own food, the aroma wafting to his nose and making his mouth water.

Taking a pair of chopsticks, he separates them and mumbling a short, "Itadakimasu" in sync with his companions, he dives in.

"Matsun, Maki doesn't like kimchi so can you take my -"

"Why do you keep asking for them? There are so many toppings to choose from, why do you not just ask for something else?" Matsukawa immediately berates Oikawa, who has his lips downturned and slightly jutted out.

"I keep telling myself that I'll eat them! But I just can't do it!" 

Matsukawa sighs, "Just leave em on the side, Oikawa."

"Fine." He mutters grumpily and Iwaizumi follows his copsticks as they shove kimchi to one side of the bowl. 

"Do you want me to take it?" He finds himself asking before he can stop himself. He doesn't mind, sure. Kimchi is one of his favorite ramen toppings. But, would it sounds weird?

His worries dissipate once Oikawa's eyes widen with a spark, replaced by more warmth. 

"Iwa-chan, my hero!" He exclaims before sliding his bowl towards Iwaizumi, and rotating it so that the kimchi is turned to him. "Feel free to take all of it~"

Hanamaki and Matsukawa snigger.

"Sure." Iwaizumi blushes as he hesitantly transfers the pickled cabbage to his bowl. He can feel the eyes on him, and that has his fingers wriggle with nervousness, which drags out the process even more.

Once he finishes, however, it's like a large bag of carbon dioxide leaves his lungs, and he's feigning casualness by focusing on his food.

"They're both red." Hanamaki whispers to Matsukawa.

"I can't decide if it's cute or disgusting."

The two of them pretend not to hear.

 

"Ahh, I'm so full." Oikawa comments while stretching. They're outside the shop, waiting for Matsukawa and Hanamaki to finish paying up. The sky is a dark amber, flushed with bits of azure. 

"Hmm, me too." 

When Hanamaki and Matsukawa exit the store, they walk the same way. Iwaizumi notices that the two of them are holding hands and swinging their joined arms, almost a little exaggeratedly. He doesn't question it, though.

"If you swing your arms any further, it'll start rotating on a pivot." Oikawa snorts.

"Wouldn't that be one heck of a sight." Hanamaki chortles.

 

"Are they dating?" Iwaizumi asks once each pair heads to a different direction.

Oikawa shrugs, turning his face towards the sky. "I don't know. They never give anyone a straight answer."

"They're quite fun to be around." He says honestly. 

"They are. I'm glad you could meet them."

"Me too."

They walk silently after that, their ears ringing with the chirping of crickets, the scraping of their shoes against the pavement, and the murmur of distant trains. The atmosphere is airy, warm on their skins, and their hair dance with each oncoming breeze. 

They pass by a familiar house.

"Isn't that your house, Oikawa?" Iwaizumi questions, gesturing towards the modest looking two storeyed house.

"About that. I got nervous the other day and thought you were following me or something." He admits, and Iwaizumi's eyes narrow into slits. "So I waited in front of a random house for a while before heading home."

"You," Iwaizumi begins, running a hand down his face, "thought I was _stalking_ you?" 

"It was possible, Iwa-chan! Beautiful people usually have stalkers, don't they?" 

Huffing loudly, he looks at Oikawa. "You're unbelievable."

"That's what makes me so great." He chirps, sticking up two fingers to form a peace sign. 

Iwaizumi shoves him gently, and that has Oikawa laughing and skipping happily until Iwaizumi stops in front of his house.

"Well, this is my stop. Not a fake one because I don't think you're stalking me."

"This is amazing."

He peers at the brunet questioningly, a little confused. His house is quite average, really. 

"What is?"

"You're my _neighbor_ , Iwa-chan!"

**Author's Note:**

> ?????? what did you think????


End file.
